Editing Project

10 Errors:

http://mtsusidelines.com/2018/04/crime-murfreesboro-police-respond-to-armed-robbery-at-shell-gas-station-on-greenland-drive/

First Error: The third sentence in the second paragraph contains a comma before the word and.

I would remove the comma because commas are typically used in a series of words or slight pausing in a sentence. Since and is used, this isn’t necessary.

http://mtsusidelines.com/2018/04/sidelines-guidelines-escape-end-of-semester-stress-with-our-top-netflix-picks/

First error: The third sentence in the first paragraph contais a comma before the word because.

I would remove the comma because a comma was used just before that and this one is unnecessary.

Second error: The second sentence in the “Stranger Things” colums doesnt contain a comma after the word episode.

I feel like a comma should be added to create pause in this long sentence.

http://mtsusidelines.com/2018/03/opinion-bruno-mars-and-the-issue-of-cultural-appropriation-in-pop-music/

First error: The first sentence in the second paragraph contains the word term followed by two quoted names listed as terms. After “vulture” the word have was used.

I would add an s to the word term since two terms was listed after. The word have can stay because it pertains to plural subjects but if the word term was to stay, have needs to be changed to has.

Second error: The first sentence in the third paragraph contains a comma after music.

I would remove the comma because the following words change direction. I would replace the comma with a period or the word but.

http://mtsusidelines.com/2018/04/rich-the-kid-includes-too-much-filler-on-debut-album-the-world-is-yours/

First error: The title doesn’t contain the word Review.

This is a review about a music album. I feel that Review should be in the title.

http://mtsusidelines.com/2018/04/former-mtsu-student-kills-mother-friend-with-long-rifle-in-east-ridge-tennessee/

First error: In the fifth paragraph, the word intends is used in a past tense sentence.

I would changed intends to intended.

http://mtsusidelines.com/2018/04/orange-is-the-new-black-actress-selenis-leyva-provides-womens-history-month-keynote-address-at-mtsu/

First error: The second sentence in the fourth paragraph contains the word councilor’s

Councilor is the wrong term for the context of this sentence. It should be counselor’s.

http://mtsusidelines.com/2018/03/crime-murfreesboro-police-respond-to-shooting-at-the-pointe-at-raiders-campus/

First error: In the furth sentence of the second paragraph, a comma is used after the word that.

I would remove the first comma because I believe this is unnecessary. Another comma is used right after that not in a series of this long sentence. The second commas used can account for the first.

Second error: The last sentence of the second paragraph contains a period after the word however.

It is supposed to be a comma after the word however or remove the comma before the word however and the word itself and the period is fine.

CIM Sidelines Editing Story (Only gave me one)

This story didn’t have many mistakes but a few comma errors I feel that was wrong.

Story:

Middle Tennessee has named its new head coach, as University of North Carolina-Asheville Nick McDevitt will be replacing Kermit Davis in Murfreesboro, according to multiple sources who informed the USA Today Network-Tennessee.

McDevitt, 38, comes to the program after spending both his college playing career and the start of his coaching tenure at UNCA. He played for the Bulldogs from 1997-2001, and became an assistant coach after his graduation. McDevitt spent 10 years as an assistant for the program, and then was named an associate in 2011.

The Marshall, N.C. native was named the head coach of the Bulldogs in 2013, and proved to be a worthy candidate for the Middle Tennessee position in his tenure. He compiled a 98-65 record in five seasons, including a 40-14 mark in conference play in his last three years.

His last three seasons were particularly solid, as UNCA won 20 or more games each season and earned a postseason berth all three years.

This culminated in 2016 when the Bulldogs won the Big South Tournament and made its fourth NCAA Tournament appearance in program history. Given a No. 15 seed, UNCA was defeated by the No. 2 seed Villanova by a final score of 86-56.

McDevitt comes to a program that has grown exponentially as a national brand in the last three years. After shocking the world and defeating the No. 2 seed Michigan State in 2015, the Blue Raiders put together their one of their best seasons in school history by putting together a 31-4 record and a program-best 17 wins in Conference USA.

This culminated in another win over a Big Ten team when they defeated the No. 5 seed Minnesota in the Round of 64 in the NCAA Tournament. Middle Tennessee followed that up this past season with a 25-8 mark and a 16-2 record in conference play.

The season made an abrupt left turn in the C-USA Tournament when the Blue Raiders were upset by heavy underdog Southern Mississippi in the quarterfinals, leaving their postseason fate in the hands of the selection committee. Forced to sweat it out on Selection Sunday, the Blue Raiders were left out of the field of 68 and were sent to the National Invitation Tournament.

Given the No. 3 seed, Middle had a first-round date with the Vermont Catamounts inside Murphy Center on Mar. 13. The Blue Raiders dominated this matchup, winning by a final score of 91-64 to get to round two. Davis was named the new head coach for Ole Miss a mere two days later on Mar. 15.

The season ended inside of the KFC Yum! Center at the hands of the Louisville Cardinals by a final score of 84-68 last Sunday.

In his time at MTSU, Davis won 332 games and eight conference championships. He was named Coach of the Year four times, and won two NCAA Tournament games.

The commas I highlighted I felt shouldn’t be there if the word an was used separate the clauses. 

9 a.m Meeting Summary

This meeting was really brief. Mike Osborne, the news director of the MTSU radio station WMOT, was the head of the meeting. When he arrived, he was accompanied by Kelly, the  student broadcasting manager. This meeting, according to Mike, is usually students and him pitching ideas, seeing if they are important enough for him to mention on his broadcast. It was about six of us students and eight of us total, all from Professor Matheson’s class. 

Mike went around the table and asked what stood out to us in the news recently. I chose the House of representatives  winning vote to permit alcohol sells on Sunday. I chose this because it could directly affect local businesses and consumers. If the Senate and Governor approve, the bill could take effect as soon as possible.

Others pitched ideas like new businesses opening and events that were going to take place soon. Another pitch that stood out to me was a former MTSU student shot and killed his mother and friend in his East Ridge home of Chattanooga,Tennessee. Its stood out to me because I attend the same college and you never know who you are in class with.  

During the end, mike mentioned volunteer and internship opportunities for WMOT and how we could benefit from it. 

 

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